She. Could. Go. All. The. Way. (your advice requested)

I've never been much on going to church or organized religion, as a rule. I can remember as a kid asking my mother what religion we were because I had been filling out Scantron bubble forms at school. My mother sighed the weary sigh of a parent given a difficult question out of the blue and said that her family was Methodist and Daddy's family was Presbyterian but that the only church I had been to was a Methodist one. I wondered briefly if this made me a religious "mix breed" and if I would have to one day pick one. But so far I've been getting by in the "other" category. Since we don't go to church, I've decided to learn more about football instead. Football is one of the major unifying forces in our society, allowing two strangers in an airport terminal to chat about The Game last week. Since I'd rather poke myself in the eye than talk politics with anyone and I've never been so great at waxing poetic on fashion, I figure football watching will be a nice addition to my hobbies.

We already watch a fair amount of football in the house, as Rich is an avid-but-not-rabid sports fan. I'm guaranteed to be blasted with AM radio sports commentators set to volume 11 anytime I get in his truck. I don't mind Mike & Mike in the morning so much, and John Madden is always good for a laugh, but Tony Mercurio makes me want to punch the dashboard.

Lately, there have been commercials for on TV. I was intrigued at what made that football website more friendly to women, except for all the pink, but was quickly disappointed with it's poor layout and heavy focus on getting me to join their fantasy league. So instead, I did some perusing on plain old and found some handy rules on Soon I'll be leaping from the sofa yelling "PICKED OFF!" like the Holy Ghost itself has ahold of me.

My only connundrum now is whom to choose as my team. The Miami Dolphins are right out because, come on, they're freakin' dolphins with helmets on their heads with a teal background. I can't own any of that merchandise. I can't pick the Detroit Lions because I'd like to see my team win one or two games and I won't be a Raiders fan because I'm just not that crazy and don't need to join a cult, just nurture a little sports hobby.

So here's where I need your help. Tell me who I should pick as my favorite team and why. The rationale for your decision can be based on anything from colors and ferocity of mascot to the effectiveness of their special team and your allegiance to them based on family history. Here's a list of all the NFL teams, in case you need a refresher.